Tuesday, 16 July 2013

ME | Catch up on life!

Hello my lovelies, and apologies for apologising so often for not posting often enough. Now I know that probably made no sense, it did in my head!

Basically I wanted to apologise for not posting as much as I used too and sort of give you the reasons why as I feel you deserve them because you people are so lovely and have stuck by me and gotten me to nearly 8,000 views which is incredible! So please bear with me, all of these I am trying to sort out and it is a case of balancing everything at the moment.

  1. As some of you will know I recently found out my IB results and I am not going to university. This means I now have to think of what my next step is and in all honesty I haven't a clue. I could do college or take a year and work or do the OU or apply in a few years as a mature student - there are so many possibilities! My parents at the moment are very pushy towards me making a decisions and the last time they did that I spent two years of my life doing a course I hated and have now failed so I do NOT want to rush this and make a bad decision. However, my head and heart is leaning towards the idea of taking a year out and working full time then doing the OU next year and moving to wherever Ben goes to university. The idea of me moving to Ben's for this next year is also a big option for me as I will explain in a moment. But right now I just need time to think and I am not being given that.
  2. I am living at Ben's a lot of the time at the moment as I am not happy at home and I do not want to be living here with my parents and the way they are treating me at the moment. However the cost of travelling to his and back is a slight issue for me but I am hopefully getting it sorted with working more hours and baby sitting more often so that I can get some more money and can travel to his easier. I am also seriously contemplating moving to Ben's in the next year, when he starts his second year of college and I take my year out, as I am basically being kicked out of my room and into the smallest room known to man and I would rather be at Ben's in his small room than be at home in a place I am not happy and where I cannot have all my things. If I stayed at home all my stuff would be in the attic and I would only have room for a wardrobe, a small chest of drawers and a single bed, and this rate I am not even going to be allowed a bed as we 'cannot afford it' which is rubbish because they are repainting 2 rooms and getting the en suite redone and resized. So I am very very keen on moving, Ben is keen on having me and his parents would be happy to have me as long as I paid some rent. 
  3. I am working a lot of over time and having driving lessons too which takes up so much time and energy and when I am not doing that I am travelling home or travelling to Ben's or wherever and it is very time consuming. Work, even when I only do a 5 hour shift, is hell. People think working in a card shop is easy but that is complete bull. It is laborious, hard work, and you have to have the will to carry on when you get rude customers and bosses being in bad moods and other colleagues turning up late so you can't have a break and things getting dropped halfway down the stairs from the stock room and it is just crazy. When it is quiet at work it is dead, but when it is busy WOOO NELLY it is like someone set hell on fire twice and danced around Satan's burning body. Not only that but our AirCon either doesn't work or only works half the time so we are spending every shift at the moment dying from the heat. Upstairs in the stock room is worse though!
HOWEVER, despite all this negativity I am trying to be better and less angry all the time, I have got myself a Pocket Finchley Filofax and I love it, I am trying to be more organised and sorting my head out and my mental state, I am working towards bigger and better things and I am making to-do lists all the time and making lists of blog posts I want to do so I am remembering to think of you guys, I just have no time or energy at the moment (plus my laptop keyboard is having funny 5 minutes all the time and all the main keys are sticking so I have to keep keyboard smashing and that is frustrating too!) I know a lot of things are going on right now but I want to try and post more than I have been and I will try and find the time to, but I thought I would write this as a little catch up so you guys were up to date and on the same page as me.

I am also saving up to get my next two tattoos which will be 'niente accade per caso' which is 'nothing happens by chance' in Italian because, as I am sure you will agree, after my educational set back that is true more so now than ever before, and the outline of an anchor in the same position as my wishbone but on my right arm. Once I get these done I will definitely be posting an updated tattoos post (as that is one of my most popular posts!) with pictures so you can see all three! So that is something I have to look forward too, which right now I need!

I hope everyone is okay though, and you are always more than welcome to contact me if you wish!

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